Oh...Sir!! Gentleman's Guide To Insults

How to insult your opponents with style in Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator.

October 26, 2016 by Morgan Shaver in Guides

Yesterday, developer Vile Monarch released the full version of their game Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator. We instantly fell in love with the Monty Python-inspired game, and have dedicated countless hours to perfecting our insult skills.

To help get you started in Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator, we’ve put together a beginner’s guide on the most effective way to insult your opponent like a proper gentleman (or gentlewoman).

The Basics of Oh...Sir!!

First, I recommend facing off against the CPU before either matchmaking with an opponent, or playing with a friend. To begin, load up the game and navigate over to the “Insult Your CPU” option.

After clicking on it you’ll be taken to a menu where you can learn to insult, partake in an instant argument, try your hand at a CPU tournament, or go back to the previous menu. After learning to insult, we recommend practicing on the "instant argument" option. Once you select instant argument, you'll be taken to a character select menu.

Pick the protagonist that appeals to you the most, then select from a variety of different scenarios. Our personal favorite is the Pet Shop, as this is where you’ll argue over the dead/sleeping parrot.

When it’s your turn, quickly analyze the available dialogue options in order to pinpoint the sentence fragments needed to construct your insult. Remember, proper grammar is important! Good ways to begin an insult include: you, your mother, your father, your sister, your hat, your country, etc. 

Oh...Sir!! Gentleman’s Guide to Insults

The most important aspect in Oh...Sir!! consists of clever sentence construction. Just like mad-libs, you are given a list of potential dialogue options to choose from and are tasked with stringing them together as best you can. In Oh...Sir!!, piecing together the longest, most hard-hitting insult possible is key.

You and your opponent share a list of sentence fragments, though you’ll each have two special ones fragments per round that you should prioritize using in order to earn more points. One helpful strategy is to grab a fragment before your opponent can. Essentially, think of Oh...Sir!! like a verbal game of tug-of-war. For example, you get extra points when you drop a combo (two “your mother” insults in a row).

Never underestimate the insult power of a Polish Winged Hussar! 

If your combo option isn’t available during the next round, but your opponent’s is, be sure to snatch it up before they can to prevent them from dealing a substantial amount of damage. Each insult is worth damage points, and the way to accrue the most is keel the following in mind.

  • Combos - Utilize the same insult in a row for extra points.
  • Sentence Structure - Selecting a fragment that doesn’t fit will result in the loss of points, weak insults deal less points. Aim for a strong, saucy sentence!
  • Length - The longer the insult, the more points.
  • Character Weakness - Each character is weak to a particular insult. If they’re sensitive about their mother, be sure to pick the “your mother” option when available.
  • Quick Grab - “Quick Grab” is a term I’ve coined to reference screwing over your opponent by either snatching a much-needed option (forcing their sentence to come out wonky), or stealing a phrase to prevent them from using it on you (c-c-c-combo breaker).

Helpful Hints

If you become stuck in a rut with nowhere else to go within your sentence, check to see if there’s a “...” option. This will allow you to hold onto your sentence and take it with you into the next round. There, you can add more to it from the next set of options.

Keep in mind, each character has their own weakness, so make it a priority to figure out what that weakness is. For example, Lo Wang’s weakness appears to be comments made in regards to his father.

If you see a “your father” option up for grabs, snag it and use it against him for maximum efficiency. Or, if you’re playing as Lo Wang, grab that option and use it against your opponent to prevent them from using it on you.

By utilizing these tips, you should be well on your way to insulting strangers like a proper gentleman/gentlewoman.

Which insult is your favorite? Let us know in the comments below! You can buy Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator on Steam and learn more about the developers on Vile Monarch's official website

For more on Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator here at Indie Obscura, be sure to check out why the parrot is most certainly not dead in our review of Oh...Sir!!, learn more about the developer's love of Monty Python in our Vile Monarch interview, and find out how Oh...Sir!! The Insult Simulator came together.